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Jesus, the “love language” of God

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The Lord Is My Chef Sunday Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Twenty-seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time, Cycle B, 06 October 2024
Genesis 2:18-24  ><}}}}*>  Hebrews 2:9-11  ><}}}}*>  Mark 10:2-16
With our student sacristans in our San Fernando Campus in Pampanga during the Mass of the Holy Spirit last year.

One of the joys of my ministry as chaplain in a university and a hospital is the daily interaction I have with young people who keep me young like them, always updated with the many trends happening among them especially in the languages they speak. In them I continue to find the many faces of Jesus Christ who continues to pass by even in this modern world so swiftly changing due to social media.

Two terms I have recently learned from them are “love language” and “situationship”. Let’s just talk about “love language” this Sunday that is more appropriate with our gospel and reserve that other word “situationship” when the setting is more apt. Lately I have noticed the term “love language” mentioned quite often in social media posts and reels. I never bothered to know it until somebody asked me what is my “love language” that threw me off balance with many wild things rushing into my mind, thinking what is it!

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

It turned out that “love language” is a term coined in 1992 by Baptist pastor Gary Chapman in his book of the same title where he identified five love languages we give and (prefer) to receive: words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. It was an amazing moment of learning from me when I realized that everyone – including us priests – has a favorite love language in expressing our love to everyone. And in our gospel today, we find that even God who is love Himself has a love language in the very person of His Son Jesus Christ!

The Pharisees approached Jesus and asked, “Is it lawful for a husband to divorce his wife?” They were testing him. He said to them in reply, “What did Moses command you?” They replied, “Moses permitted a husband to write a bill of divorce and dismiss her.” But Jesus told them, “Because of the hardness of your hearts he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, no human being must separate” (Mark 10:2-9).

Photo by author, 2024; I have loved mosses that thrive even with little sunlight, reminding us of God’s grace especially when we are in darkness and tribulations.

Jesus and the Twelve continued their journey to Jerusalem with His teachings not only getting more exciting but actually more difficult and hard as He addressed the thorny issue of divorce which continues to divide us in this modern age.

Interestingly enough, this scene happened while Jesus and the Twelve were in Judea, the province governed by King Herod who had John the Baptist arrested and later beheaded upon the instigation of his wife Herodias. John spoke against Herod’s taking of Herodias as wife because she used to be the wife of his own brother Philip then governing another province. One can just imagine the grave danger the Pharisees have exposed Jesus in discussing divorce right in the turf of an evil ruler living with an adulteress!

As usual, Jesus did not fall into the test by the Pharisees because He had no intentions of joining our endless debates about divorce as He knew very well that it is something so complicated that has continued to ruin human relationships as a result of the “hardness of our hearts”. Recall too similar instances when Jesus was asked for an opinion in politics like the paying of taxes to Caesar and the settlement of disputes among brothers regarding their inheritance. See how Jesus would always make it clear that His mission is not to settle our disputes in economics and politics nor personal relationships but to always reveal to us the will of God.

Instead of giving a simple answer of “yes” or “no” on the lawfulness of a divorce or the paying of taxes to the Romans, Jesus would always bring us to God our Father, the very core of our being and relationships. It is only in being rooted again in God when we realize personally, existentially why we have to strive in choosing what is true, good and beautiful no matter how difficult it may be.

Photo by Deesha Chandra on Pexels.com

This Sunday, Jesus is not offering compromises to us weak human beings about divorce but rather proposes the ideal of marriage by going back to its very source and beginning, God Himself who is love.

That is why our first reading was taken from Genesis to remind us and make us realize that everything, most especially man and woman – is created by God. Everything in this world was from God, especially our desire for union and communion which we also find expressed even by trees and plants as well as animals.

However, what makes us distinct from the rest of creation as we see in other parts of Genesis is God breathing on us His breath of life that gives us the consciousness of our oneness, of that transcendent otherness called humanity that makes us realize our deeper reality in the “I-Thou” relationship. Plants and animals do not have that consciousness.

Photo by author, St. Scholastica Retreat Center, Tagaytay City, August 2024.

The creation of a woman as suitable partner of man is not a result of an after-thought of God as if He never knew man would never be fulfilled without a woman. The creation of woman being taken from one of the ribs of man cast into a deep sleep by God reminds us of each person being a gift to everyone. No pet nor plant can bring that kind of ecstasy and joy of finding somebody like us, of bringing unity in every one who is incomplete in one’s self.

See how Jesus repeated the Genesis account “that is why” or “for this reason” a man leaves his father and mother and be joined with his wife to become one.

This tendency of ours towards one another, a consciousness of then other person, is a gift and a grace indicating our origin who is God who always relates with us. Every time we destroy this unity, whenever we upset this complementarity among us in God, that is when disorder happens, generating competitions among us that lead to our endless conflicts that only leave us with more pains and sorrows. Hence, back in the house again towards the end of our gospel scene this Sunday, Jesus reiterated the example of the child after His disciples drove them away.

Photo by author, statue of the Child Jesus hugging St. Joseph, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, March 2024.

How lovely and ironic that despite the weaknesses and incompleteness of children, we find in them all five love languages too. What a joy to play and converse with children, especially carry babies despite their lack of language skills we find each one a love language in himself/herself – exactly like Jesus Christ, the love language of God who gave us everything to experience oneness in love.

God knows everything that He created us in His own image and likeness. Nothing, not even sin could ever destroy His grand design for us since creation so that right after the Fall, God right away promised salvation fulfilled in Jesus Christ whom He had sent to remind us anew of His wonderful plan for us.

I have a similar image like this in my room, my most favorite statue of St. Joseph as protector of the Child Jesus and Mary. But most of all, we find Jesus being the love language of God even in his childhood with His all-encompassing love that reached its highest point at the Crucifixion.

God knows everything, especially our weaknesses in keeping our relationships. Jesus is not judging us and knows very well the pains many are enduring as a result of separation and divorce. The Letter to the Hebrews we heard in the second reading tells us how Jesus in suffering death has become like us in order to share with us the grace we need to keep our human relationships strong.

Every Sunday, I visit our patients in the hospital to give them Holy Communion, hear their confessions and often, anoint most of them with Oil for the sick.

Whenever I meet couples especially those already old and with debilitating sickness, I praise God for the tremendous grace he gives them. In them I always find God so truly present among us, especially in every husband and wife lovingly serving each other in sickness and in health. Let us pray for all couples that they may cooperate with God’s grace in keeping their marriage alive. Amen. Have a blessed week ahead!

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