HUWEBES, HULYO 6, 2023

Connections

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Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 20 October 2026

This piece is long overdue but recent events in my life, though so simple, convinced me to finally put into words my thoughts about connection and connecting.

We are all created to connect as Michaelangelo perfectly portrayed in his painting of the Creation at the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel in the Vatican which is widely used in many ads, from Levi’s jeans to every major telephone companies around the world.

Because, with connections, we live, we prosper, we grow. Without it, we decay. Then die.

According to a recent TED talk episode I have seen, the top leading predictor for longevity in life is the kind of relationships or connections we keep in life. In a study of thousands of people from different backgrounds, it was found that people actively connected, actively interacting with others are the ones who live longest. The study ranked obesity and smoking way below as predictors of longevity; so, keep connecting, clicking wine glasses and beer pitchers with friends and relatives!

Any break in connections is an indication of separation and isolation. Of sin, most of all. That is why, any relationship on the rocks or had gone sour is always marked by cold silence among family and friends, even plain acquaintances. You see them suddenly not talking to each other, refusing to eat together, even avoiding to look at each other.

Many times our connections happen unconsciously. Or serendipitously where magic often happens, like love at first sight perhaps. It can happen with people we casually take as one of the guys, one of those ordinary folks we meet daily in work or in the neighborhood.

Last Sunday I was invited by one of our drivers in the University to attend his birthday party thrown by his elder sisters in a restaurant in Bulacan near our home. It turned out that weeks before his birthday, he had asked some people in the office to invite me because he was too shy to ask me personally; but, everyone told him malabo pumunta si Father, busy yun kasi Sunday.

But, he tried his luck when we bumped into each other at the lobby of our building one afternoon, blurting out in successive words his invitation with quick excuses that he would ot mind at all if I am so busy and tired. Because it would be his 60th birthday, I assured him I would come.

And glad that I came, even so late.

It was only then when I learned of his life story as he cried expressing his fervent wish to be reunited with his wife and children. One of his friends thanked me as I left the party, saying how Rollie was deeply happy and affirmed, kahit na isang driver lang siya, pinuntahan siya ng isang pari. The following Monday, we met again at the lobby, he shook my hands and warmly expressed his gratitude to my coming to his party that made his elder sisters so happy too.

That’s when I realized how it mattered a lot to him. I have experienced it so many times in my 28 years of priesthood, of how people look up to us priests that it was an honor for them to receive us as their guests. This is most true with those with less in life, saying the same lines over and over, mabuti naman po Father pinuntahan ninyo kami maski mahirap lang kami. People like it most when we priests connect with them no matter what is their situation in life, when we smell like them our sheep as Pope Francis would always say of us priests.

Many times, we take our connections for granted, taking them as so simple with no big deal at all but for some, it means the whole world for them because every connection leads to joy and freedom: the joy of acceptance, the joy of friendships that make us realize that we do not have to pretend to be somebody else, to be free and be our true selves because we are accepted and appreciated. Most of all, because of feeling connected, we feel not alone, always with somebody at our side, giving us the strength to forge on in life even when everything seems to be dark and bleak, difficult and fearsome. Or even when we feel ourselves in a mess, we feel we have connections that will pull us through.

Last September 28, we were invited to join the birthday celebration of Archbishop Socrates Villegas of Dagupan-Lingayen Archdiocese.

For the longest time even before getting ordained, I have always looked up to him and admired him from afar. That is why I felt so glad and blessed when my brother priests in my first assignment were his contemporaries at San Carlos Seminary that we finally got to personally meet and know each other. From then on, we would always meet on many occasions in simple greetings and short conversations.

On his birthday celebration, I felt a different connection. A blessed one because it is something so priestly, so unique that I felt him as a father and a brother.

He invited our group, the Ephesus Cares Ministry to join him in celebrating his birthday Mass with their retired priests; kami lang daw ang iba niyang bisita maliban sa kanilang mga pari.

It was on that occasion of Bishop Soc’s birthday when I got this idea about connections, of being connected.

How I loved that scene at the chapel before the Mass and blessing of new duplex homes for their retired priests: there was Bishop Soc praying in silence in front, connecting with Jesus our Eternal Priest. This is something Bishop Soc has consistently taught in his talks and homilies especially to priests and lay people alike: our strongest connection in life is prayer to be in communion with God in Jesus always because when everything else fails in life, God remains connected with us.

Later, the retired priests came and all the more I appreciated the scene in their chapel: Bishop Soc connected with his elderly priests! How edifying to see and experience the bishop choosing to connect exclusively with his retired, sick, and elderly priests on his birthday. How wonderful that after all the other birthday celebrations tendered for him, Bishop Soc chose to close his birthday celebration with a Mass and dinner with his priests, retired and active. No outsiders nor laypeople except our Ephesus Cares volunteers.

During dinner, Bishop Soc asked me to sit beside him in the table with his other priests. We talked a lot of things but what I like most was when he told me I am always welcomed there or even in his residence in case I want to rest, to get connected with Jesus. And he is willing to guide me too.

A week after that, I received from the mail a letter from Bishop Soc thankin me for coming to his birthday and for the card I have given him that day. He asked only for one thing: that I pray for his priests and his seminarians preparing for the priesthood that they may have the strength to remain good priests. It was something I never expected considering his busy schedule but here is a Bishop we see and hear and read everywhere proclaiming the good news of Jesus Christ. He is so good at it because he is clearly so connected – with God, with himself and with others. Salamuch for connecting with me. Let’s keep connected. God bless!