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By Bishop Dennis Villarojo –
Auxiliary Bishop of the Archdiocese of Cebu
former Secretary of Cardinal Vidal
Your eminence, you gave me one vital piece of advice, you said, “do not quarrel with the religious sisters, people laugh then as they laugh now, and they thought you meant it as a joke, but I know you are dead serious.
It is not because the religious sisters are quarrelsome by nature,it was not because you help women and you love the religious sisters so much, you spent a good part of your life forming the missionary catechist of Saint Therese. You once told me that when you were Bishop the Servant of God Alfredo Maria Obviar, find you as spiritual director of the MCST sisters. Your Father Fructoso Vidal Sr., whom everybody fondly calls Lolo Tusong, tripled his holy hour before the Blessed Sacrament, he prayed hard for you. No it wasn’t because you have a low regard to women that you gave that advice. It was not about women at all, but about the nature of our quarrels and a formula for peace.
We quarrel with people because we allow our prejudices to cloud our judgment. What we do not understand, we fear, what we fear, we considered our enemies. What you told us then is a formula for peace. “Ayaw pangaway sa mga madre” you really mean to say, “Ayaw pangaway kang bisan kinsa, kay basin ang imong makaaway karon, makatabang nimo sa umaabot.” Those who disagree with us are not necessarily our enemies, they could be our most vital collaborators, our most important allies allowing disagreement to alienate us from others is like cutting off our limbs when they start aching.
Your eminence, much has been said about your gift for peacemaking, I once attended a meeting you had with two opposing factions, you sat at the table while the worrying parties try to resolve their differences. Your eminence you simply listen in silence, but your presence allowed the parties to talk to each other in a civil and rational manner, not because they respected each other, but because they respected you and in their respect to you they have to listen to each other, and listening to each other they begun to appreciate each other’s point of view. It was not long before they came to an agreement and came out of the meeting as friends.
Do not pick a fight with anybody in a moment when our nation is polarized. You stood your ground and remained neutral even for a point of being misunderstood. The moral high ground you took,enabled you to broker a peace among the worrying factions knowing that some of our quarrels are not really based on principles but on personalities. You understood what the Lord meant when he said, “He who is not against you is with you.
“Dili kinahanglang mangaway ni bisan kinsa nga dili mouyon kanamo. Ang gikinahanglan lamang mao ang pagpasabot, pagpamati, pagpakighigala. Sa 13 ka tuig nako nga nag-alagad kanimo, wala gayud ako nakadungog kanimo nga namalikas. Masuko ka apan molagom lang ang imong nawong . Klaro kaayo nga ikaw nasuko apan ang pulong nga mogawas ra gyud sa imong baba mao ang pambihira, mao ra gyud na.”
You might have extended your life span, had you expressed your feelings more freely you’re father lived up to a hundred and four, and you could have lived longer than 86 if you had let loose of your emotions more often. But that would not be right, you would rather embrace the pain than let it out to cause pain on others. Your eminence you have mastered the art of reaching out to people, be it in the corridors of power or in the humble rectories of country priests. You spared no effort to sow seeds of good will knowing that harvest season comes not only in times of peace but also in moments of conflict. You believe that quarrels are always manmade and the best way to resolve them is not to the in personal and often brutal battle field of the airwaves or the social media, but face to face, heart to heart. Instead of making public pronouncements, you made personal visits. Instead of merely issuing pastoral letters, you formed the people’s conscience by catechesis and grassroots organization. When you organize the Cebu Citizens involvement for maturation and political empowerment and liberation, it was not only n view of safeguarding the electoral process but also formation and conscientization of the people towards political maturation.
Your Eminence, your wisdom in political matters is deeply rooted in your spirituality. The first time ever I was able to speak to you was when I was on my second year in the seminary. You made a visit to the seminary and you made your way to a group of us first year college seminarians.
“Sa dihang nagutana ka namo kumusta ang among kinabuhi sa seminaryo, amo dayong gigamit ang kahigayonan sa pagsang-at sa among reklamo.”
Seminarians are natural born whiners. Your eminence, we said, the seminary food was nicer enough, nor good enough. We were utterly dumb struck by your response, you said “Maayo man sad nga mokaon ta apan dili mabusog.” It is good to eat and yet not become full.
Your eminence I realized that what you’ve said was not just a diet program, but a lesson in self-restrict. We can but we may not. “ Dili kinahanglang ato gyud nga buhaton bisan kon mahimo nato buhaton. Magbaton sad tag pagpugong sa kaugalingon kay dili tanan natong mabuhat angay buhaton.”
It is good to eat, and yet not become full. Regulate your desires, “Ayaw pun-a ang imong tiyan kon mokaon ka, pagbilin ug luna kay moinom pa ra ba kag tubig.” He who seeks his life will lose it. He will loses his life for may seek will find it.
“Sayod ka cardinal nga ang maong mga away nagagikan sa among tinguha nga makabentaha, ang among mga kagubot nasukad sa among taras nga dili gayud magpautang ug kabubut-on. Kon malapasan gani mi kiha dayon, guruyon dayon namo ang among silingan ngadto sa barangay. Pero kon kami makabentaha magpasuko suko dayon badlungon. Kon kami mangutang magpalooy-looy pero kung paninglan mokusmod. Namo Cardinal nga kon aduna lang kami pagpugong sa kaugalingon kon dili namo ti-tion ang among katungod ug daginoton ang tanan namong mahakop mas dali namong maangkon ang kalinaw sa katilingban. Maayo diay nga mokaon apan dili busog.”
What you gave us your eminence in reply to our complaint was a formula for the care of our souls. Beyond care for bodily food the more important thing is care for our souls. How wonderfully you have cut us in our whining while teaching us a lesson beyond our immediate concerns, in your own way you have make here to us the Lord’s injunction. If you wish to become my disciple you must deny yourself, take up your cross and follow me.
Your eminence, the last time we spoke before you entered in the state of delirium was in your residence in Sto. Niño Village, it was in fact your last word to me and one I consider the most important, you said, “Take care of your brother priests.” I always known that you love your priests so much, but ‘till the end they were foremost in your mind. I used to grumble when you leave too early for your masses in the parishes I realized later, you wanted to spend more quality time with your priests, talking, laughing, and bonding with your fellow workers in the vineyard of the Lord. Priest however from seven in the morning to twelve in noon you would wait at your residence as endless streams of visitors give you their Christmas and New Year greeting. You will address each of the group repeating the same message one after the other. I will sit by and at the end of the day I will already memorize the message line by line, but it didn’t matter, each group felt you cared for them, each group was fed with some food and they leave your residence.
These past few days, they came back your eminence, follow them and more they all passed your mortal remains to pay their last respects and you didn’t have to say a word because they have memorized your message given throughout the years of your life in ministry. Ayaw pangaway, pagkat-on pagpugong sa kaugalingon, atimana ang usag-usa. I have many more things to say to you your eminence but I cannot hold you for long, I think you need to rest now. The burdens you carried in this world have worn out your body.
Thank you for carrying us all on your shoulders, and sorry for having been too much of a burden in times. Rest now faithful servant you are truly a child of God.
